Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Uninteresting Interlude

So, it's been a long time since I've written. My life has fallen apart, been built back up, gone crazy, etc. Nothing particularly important. As I've been putting the pieces back together I've been doing a lot of thinking. Some good, some bad, some of the same circles of though going around and around.

It all comes back to a main point... women and relationships are far too time/energy (and money) intensive. For all the good things that come from relationships I'm not sure I believe they are worth the effort anymore.

I feel like I've gotten myself into a pretty good place mentally. My confidence is higher than it's been in a long time. I've made goals and am working towards them. Whereas all of the women (and most of everyone for that matter) that I meet are the complete opposite. They need energy, they need time, they need reassurance, they need... period. They need. They're all needy. I want to bring good energy into a relationship and receive positive energy in return, even if it's a one night relationship. A minute, an hour, a month... Instead, I give and give and give... and there's nothing back. Well, there's sex. But even sex isn't that interesting when they don't have the mentality to back it up.

So, I sit here by myself most nights. I study for upcoming exams. I work out, I learn, I play music and I write. Sometimes I get lonely but then I look at the people I know in relationships and I see them going around in the same circles without progressing anywhere, satisfied with mediocrity and draining on each other. It simply reaffirms my feelings of better-off-without...

On some level I always considered myself a romantic and suddenly there doesn't seem to any 'romance' to look forward to. I guess there's the possibility of finding someone special at some point but that feels less and less likely as the days go by.

Like everything else in life I guess I'll just have to wait and see how it goes.

12 comments:

  1. Not sure that makes any sense to me but you should rock on just the same.

    ReplyDelete
  2. 在莫非定律中有項笨蛋定律:「一個組織中的笨蛋,恆大於等於三分之二。」. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

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  3. 生命就像騎單車一樣,除非你停止踩踏板,否則不會掉下去。......................................................

    ReplyDelete
  4. 在莫非定律中有項笨蛋定律:「一個組織中的笨蛋,恆大於等於三分之二。」............................................................

    ReplyDelete