Wednesday, December 11, 2013

Johnny's Going to Europe

In the midst of my new found sobriety I received news that the firm needed to send someone to Europe for a few weeks to check in on various business interests.  As one of the new guys I was volunteered for the job.  Oh, darn.  The only problem is being in Europe and not being able to sample the wine, which does suck.

There are various interests in a couple different countries but the work should be pretty easy, mostly just checking numbers and making sure everything is running smoothly.  So, it should be straightforward, giving me plenty of time to explore.  Mostly it will be in Greece, in an area that I've already been to, but it still beats chilling at my bachelor pad for the next two weeks.  Wining, dining, and... Ok, just the dining then... and women (hopefully).  I figure if I hang out at the bar in the hotel, drinking soda water (sigh), then maybe I can pick up a few women on business.  Or a hooker.

No, I'm not going to pick up a hooker.  That would be illegal.  Probably immoral too depending on your religious preference.  Sins of the flesh and all that.  Also, I'm really looking forward to having "He never paid for sex" engraved on my tombstone.  That'll be the only grave site that parents will block their children's eyes to keep from reading on their way to visit Grandma.

Besides, I've been to that part of Greece and never saw any hookers that looked good enough to tempt me from my streak.  If they were attractive, and I was drinking, you never know, but all the ones I saw looked like they were past their expiration date by about two decades.  And I won't be drinking, so no beer goggles to use as a scapegoat for bad decisions.

This will actually be a nice break from my normal routine.  A vacation from my day to day reality, give me some time to myself without the usual distractions, and give me a chance to reevaluate everything.

So, it'll probably be driving around Europe and seeing some sights.  I'll keep everyone posted on Johnny's adventures in Europe, possibly with some photos or sordid stories.  Is it weird that I kind of want to have some crazy sex adventure on this trip just so I can write about it here?

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